We the People

We the People . . .

did not ask men to violate the bodies of women, nor did we ask men to create laws to punish us for our beliefs and constitution-given rights.

We the People . . .

are human beings with minds, bodies, and beating hearts. The laws of this nation need to validate gender equality, and void male domination over females in every area of a woman’s life.

We the People . . .

means, as women, we deserve identical respect as men and must never be treated as subservient.

We the People . . .

are wives, mothers, grandmothers, sisters, children, friends, aunts, partners and spouses, regardless of what genes we possess and do not have, or what status we have attained or not.

We the People . . .

are women who have been traumatized for centuries by men who seek the power to dominate and rule our lives with pain, punishment, and suffering.

We the People . . .

are millions of women who want to be heard.

Men, why aren’t you listening?

______________________________

I recently wrote this piece out of frustration for the way the rights of women are being violated. I may be frustrated, but I’ll NEVER GIVE UP! Are you bothered by the latest news on women rights? Let me know.

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A New E-Book for You

If you feel you need some new enlightenment on the subject of healing from trauma, you will enjoy my personal essays. This new e-book, published in March 2019 on Amazon, has twelve essays focusing on how you can take the lead in your healing. I address three of the most important elements needed to heal from traumatic events. They include: mind, body, and spirit. Like a three-legged stool, if one leg is broke, the stool collapses. The same applies to your health. You need your mind, body, and spirit working together to bring about wellness to every cell, muscle, bone, organs, and every system to achieve great health and recover from trauma!

Remember, trauma, in all its forms, constantly steals our raw energy, and it is up to us to save that energy to create lives full of potential, hope, and health. There are hundreds of traumatic experiences we face in this life. Remember, too, that abuse trauma is never our fault and we are not responsible. We ARE responsible for healing our minds, bodies, and spirits.

Let the truth of trauma propel you to use the repairing tools and practices discussed in these essays.

NEVER GIVE UP — EVER!!!

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November Issue

Thanksgiving Blessings 

At Thanksgiving, my wife and I celebrate by stating what we are the most grateful for in the past year. Countless thanks go out to her for being employed and healthy. Due to her employment, I have health insurance and the ability to seek medical attention when it is necessary. Even though I have a list of medical conditions and quirky foibles, my wife has been by my side for 27 years and continues to love me. She is a blessing that goes beyond the mysteries of life, a partner who encourages me to reach for the impossible, and a friend who supports my efforts to be as authentic as I can be.

My thanks are for endless moments of incredible joy and happiness we have together observing the sunsets in Portugal, swimming in the Dead Sea in Jordan, exploring the Mayan ruins in Tulum, Mexico, and climbing the Cliffs of Moher in Ireland. The mist in the distance of the cliffs remind me of reading books like The Mists of Avalon, Jane Eyre, and Wuthering Heights. These books have fueled my imagination for creating characters in my novels who seek truth and unconditional love, and who are challenged continually by life’s traumatic events.

I am honored to receive the 2018 Living Now Evergreen gold medal presented to my book, Never Give Up: Break the Connection Between Stress and Illness. The Living Now awards are given to books that change people’s lives. When I had a six percent chance of survival, I wrote this book which transformed my life. Many readers have given me feedback that the book has transformed their lives as well. I truly believe that healing from illness and trauma starts in the soul where the spark of life is fueled and fortified.

I am beyond grateful for creating “The Road to Unresolved Trauma Healing” (TRUTH) program that helps people heal from all types of trauma. TRUTH program is a tremendous gift which allowed me the time to research proven techniques to strengthen the mind, body, and spirit of the participants who make a continual commitment to heal from trauma. I am grateful for their endless efforts to resolve issues including physical, sexual, and emotional harm.

Being asked to write monthly articles for Sibyl Magazine has been a highlight of my year. I want to thank Sibella Publications and staff for allowing me to help women who are trying to heal from trauma. Surviving trauma can be a very lonely place, but it is my hope that readers have found their voices and courage in my words. Stories of sexual abuse and assault need to be told – and told often – to eliminate this terrible wrong in the world.

Also, I am grateful for my friends who pick me up in dark times, celebrate the good times, and are my true family. We are all warriors in our world of constant change. This Thanksgiving I am overflowing with a soul filled with gratitude and a life filled with blessings.

NEVER GIVE UP!

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New Program Coming Soon!

One of the first lessons we learn as children is to tell the truth. For children who are physically, emotionally, and psychologically abused and traumatized, this lesson becomes a dire challenge. Frequently threatened and told to lie these children — now adults — grow further and further from the truth.

That is until now. In the coming weeks, I’ll be sharing with you a new program to help resolve trauma issues to achieve a healthy mind, body, and spirit. If trauma is making you sick, check out the T.R.U.T.H Program and find out how you can live a life of possibilities and promise.

T.R.U.T.H Program =
The Road to Unresolved Trauma Healing

Coming soon . . .

 

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Living with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

I received the diagnosis of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) about ten years ago, after my daughter was involved in a serious accident while walking to school. Before the accident, I worked hard to keep my life, my family and their world so protected that the instant she got hit, my controlled snow globe world instantly cracked, hit the ground, and shattered. In fact, when my son and I were talking the day of the accident, he looked at me and innocently said, “Things will never be the same again.”  Extremely prophetic words that at the time neither myself nor my family had any idea what they would come to mean.

During the year following my daughter’s accident, I was busy with tending to her health, taking her to appointments, trying to work full time, and keeping our household running as normally as possible. Simultaneously, I kept having strange experiences that were making me feel like I was losing my mind. I couldn’t stop and think about what was happening, nor did I have the words to describe it to anyone. It was just an overwhelming sense of fear, and general feeling that I was going slowly going mad.

I was becoming anxious. I started losing all sense of time; finding myself wondering where I had been the last few hours and feeling incredibly disconnected from my body and the world. I was called into meetings at work because my performance was terribly erratic. I felt physically sick all the time. And I kept having these bizarre explosive memories leaving me feeling out of control and disoriented.  I knew something was seriously wrong with me, so I made a call to a psychologist who agreed to see me the next day.

When I started working with my first therapist, I was anxious to tell her everything all at once. I thought if I could word-vomit everything that was coming to my mind, that would be enough to feel better and get back to work.

I didn’t understand that I was having flashbacks, and that I was living in a constant state of crisis. I was writing my therapist letters from a dissociated state which made no sense but felt vaguely familiar as she would read them aloud. I would lock myself in my room for hours fearing that I was going to hurt myself, and I didn’t want to be around my family. I felt out of control, thinking I was losing my mind, feeling like I had failed my myself, my family, and I began spiraling down a very slippery slope.

One of the most important practices to have in place when beginning trauma therapy is to have a safety plan. I needed to develop tools for many things, including distress tolerance. Once a plan was in place, we could begin the process of working on and processing my trauma.

Not only was my therapy about processing the memories, but I also had to start accepting that there were some intense effects of the trauma, and they influenced how I saw and reacted to the world.

I also had to face how my trauma affected my relationships with my family, friends, parenting style, and career. While dealing, and coping with the trauma, there were a lot of “aha” moments. I saw how my behavior and ways of coping with life, were a direct result of my trauma and not because I was a bad person.

Some of my PTSD symptoms still have a good choke-hold on me. As with many illnesses, PTSD can be invisible on the outside. My symptoms include (not limited too) flashbacks, concentration issues, becoming overwhelmed which leads to feeling like my brain is shutting down, difficulty making choices, anxiety/depression, and a sensitivity to triggers. I sometimes use the phrase, “triggers, triggers everywhere.” The wind can blow a certain way, or fireworks, or a car backfiring, even the moon can sometimes bring on flashbacks.

Once I was able to name and accept my symptoms, I needed to learn to work within my deficits. This wasn’t easy or comfortable for me. And honestly, there are still times I find myself becoming frustrated and angry at my PTSD. When that happens, I stop, and use my grounding tools to rest and reset.

Writing gave me the courage I needed to address the pain I was feeling. I would write even when I thought I had nothing to write about. Often, I would write and send what I wrote off to my therapist. I started to find that I could write what I couldn’t say aloud.  At first, it provided distance from having to use my voice, but then I found writing gave me a voice.

Learning to recognize and acknowledge each step on my path towards health and understanding is a long and never linear process that helps keep me in a resilient mindset. I also try to remember to notice the perfect moments. I made myself understand that are 24-hours in a day, and within those hours are some spectacular moments.

I was not going to let the effects of what happened to me keep me from trying to have the life I wanted. I never lose sight of my goals. They are to live with my past, live in the truth, and recognize and relish in the feelings of internal contentment. Some days those goals seem as far away as the furthest star, and other days I understand that, I am living in my truth, I am content and understand that I’m not just a survivor of trauma, but that I am thriving despite my trauma.

Thank you, Alexis and the Never Give Up Institute for inviting me to be a guest writer on your blog. The work you do is truly inspiring!

Alexis Rose
Author, Speaker
https://atribeuntangled.com/blog/
atribeuntangled@gmail.com

Thank you, Alexis Rose, for your enlightening blog on PTSD. I know my readers will appreciate your insights, vulnerability, and power to survive. Thanks a million for being a guest blogger on my website.

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Building Resilience Against Trauma

I recentlcrime-scene-30112_1280y attended a conference on “Building Resilience.” It was an awesome day as I gained new insight into how we survive trauma. Those in attendance were social workers, Minnesota Department of Health crisis staff, psychologists, non-profits dealing with the homeless and sex trafficking victims, women’s group facilitator, medical professionals, and wellness advocates like me. It was a delightful day of meeting new people and learning new information.

I’m excited  to learn that the information I present in my blogs is both timely and accurate. Some of the new insights I learned are amazing as we live with acute trauma and post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). Here are some of the things I know or learned:

  1. An estimated two-thirds of American adults have experienced one or more potentially traumatic exposures in their lifetime.
  2. Stemming from events or circumstances experienced as physically or emotionally harmful or life threatening, trauma can result in significantly diminished mental, physical, social, emotional, and spiritual well-being; leading to lost productivity, function and social participation.-George Family Foundation Catalyst Initiative
  3. Trauma doesn’t define who we are.
  4. The most intimate relationship is between you and the Divine.
  5. The Divine isn’t outside of us — the Divine is within us.
  6. When we internalize our own inner Divine we can connect and extend the Divine to others — this is the power of love.
  7. Creating circles of people dispenses hierarchy.
  8. You can meditate with your eyes open. This technique is especially great for those of us who have experienced trauma and are afraid to close our eyes. It’s okay — you can still meditate — with your eyes open!
  9. We can’t connect with others if we’re not connected to ourselves first.
  10. Margaret Mitchell said, “Every problem has two handles. You can grab it by the handle of fear or the handle of hope.”
  11. Depression is the #1 cause of disability in the U.S.
  12. Sleep is the missing link in recovering from depression.
  13. The first arrow causes us physical pain, which we can’t ignore. The second arrow is the mental pain and suffering we add on top of the physical pain. -Buddhist Teaching
  14. The first thought you have in the morning is what you worship.

Trauma impacts a large toll on us and those around us — and society as a whole. According to the American Foundation of Suicide Prevention, “In 2014 (latest available data), there were 42,773 reported suicide deaths.” The inability to copy with trauma and increased depression affect us all. Isn’t it time we eliminate the trauma in our homes and society, and the resulting depression and illness, and find ways to connect with trauma survivors to build a better quality of Life?

I think so! And I’ll never give up!

 

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