“Forbidden?”

Dear Wellness Seekers:

I apologize for my website being down for 10 days. Seems I reached my space limit and, as you are probably aware, my site grew slower and slower. Well, that’s all been fixed as this site now has more space and power! I’m not sure what the “Forbidden” message was, but this site has never been forbidden nor was it hacked. I apologize for the worry this page caused. Thanks for sticking with me as I tore my hair out trying to get this fixed.

Did you know that the month of April is National Child Abuse Prevention Month? That means you’ll be seeing more information about how to stop and prevent the growing number of child abuse cases. I need your help to make sure the public knows and understands what child abuse is and how it harms our children. Adults who were abused as children are needed to tell their stories and start a chain-reaction to prevent this from happening.

Child abuse is a pandemic filled with threats, injuries, and lies. The following ghastly statistics are from the American Society for the Positive Care of Children (American SPCC) and include:

  • For all [other] types of abuse and neglect, statistics are about equal for boys and girls.
  • Although children of all ages experience abuse and neglect, it is the youngest children that are the most vulnerable; 7 per 1,000 children are victims of child abuse and neglect in their first year of life.
  • Annual estimate: 1,770 children died from abuse and neglect in 2018.
  • Almost five children die every day from child abuse.
  • 6 percent of all child fatalities were younger than 3 years old.
  • 3 percent of child fatalities involve at least one parent.
  • Estimated that between 50-60 percent of maltreatment fatalities are not recorded on death certificates.
  • Child abuse crosses all socioeconomic and educational levels, religions, ethnic and cultural groups.
  • 14 percent of all men in prison and 36 percent of women in prison in the USA were abused as children, about twice the frequency seen in the general population.
  • It is estimated, by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, (CDC) that there are over 42 million adult survivors of child abuse in the U.S.
  • There are so many more heart-breaking statistics…

As a child sexual abuse survivor I find these statistics to be appalling. One of the most revolting part of all is that child sexual and physical abuse continues throughout our planet (and perhaps the universe). If we don’t stop child abuse now it will only grow into a more devastating event. Do children deserve this? NO! Do you deserve to be healed? YES!

I’m working on a new book titled, Your Moment of T.R.U.T.H.: The Road to Unresolved Trauma Healing. It is a companion book to my T.R.U.T.H. Program Workbook, created to bring more information and tools to resolve trauma. I’ll let you know when it’s published.

During the month of April, will you do one thing to help me spread the word that child and domestic abuse are not okay? You can let your friends know about my website and have them register for new posts and tools. Thank you!

____________________________________________________________________

 Alexis Acker-Halbur is an award-winning author and medical miracle. Child abuse made her seriously ill and put her in harm’s way numerous times. She survived and now shares her experiences and tools with women and men who have been traumatized. To order her tools for healing trauma book, Never Give Up: Break the Connection Between Stress and Illness, click here. If you would like to read her 2020 published fictional novel, THE BEAR: In the Middle of Between click here.

2020

Dear Wellness Seekers:

I recently wrote this poem to try and find some answers to my anguish. This year has been a disaster and yet I keep plodding on. If you feel the same, I hope this poem helps you understand the stress we all are under. Stay safe and I wish you well.

2020

The winds howled in chaos,
and life as we knew it was gone.
From politics to pandemic,
our hearts rallied to stay strong.

We went through months of anguish,
with our democracy shattered.
We cried and prayed and pushed the alarm,
yet, nothing seemed to matter.

I looked for a sign of hope,
but change appeared to be lost.
My depression grew with flourish,
my beliefs and values tossed.

“Vote” they said would do me good,
so I signed and mailed my ballot.
It felt fierce to express my right,
and cleanse our land of maggots.

I’m tired of the lies and
the evil forced on us each day.
The world laughs at my country,
Should I leave or should I stay?

Autocrats will steal my soul,
and make me think like them.
They will never ever succeed,
we will fight them to the end.

So, rise up America,
we need to take our country back.
Healing from 2020 will take years,
start to believe in truthful facts.

__________________________________

Alexis Acker-Halbur is an award-winning author and medical miracle. Child abuse made her seriously ill and put her in harm’s way many times. She survived and shares her experiences and tools with women and men who have been traumatized. To order her book, Never Give Up: Break the Connection Between Stress and Illnessclick here, or her newly published fictional novel, THE BEAR: In the Middle of Between click here.

A Portrait of Trauma

Dear Wellness Readers:

Trauma comes in all shapes and sizes and no one is immune from experiencing the life-changing effects trauma causes – even for the President of the United States. According to Dr. Lance Dodes, retired Assistant Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, “[Donald] Trump became the same sadistic tyrannical and cruel person his father was.” Does early childhood trauma give Trump an excuse for being a psychopath (a term that is now interchangeable with sociopath)? There is no simple answer to this question.

Mary Stout, author of the book, The Sociopath Next Door, says “Imagine – if you can – not having a conscience, none at all, no feelings of guilt or remorse no matter what you do, no limiting sense of concern for the well-being of strangers, friends, or even family members. Imagine no struggles with shame, not a single one in your whole life, no matter what kind of selfish, lazy, harmful, or immoral action you had taken…”

Trump is the son of an abusive father and a neglectful mother contributing to living his life “…driven by an insatiable narcissistic hunger to be loved, accepted, admired, praised … and the need to dominate.” Other than dominate, don’t we all need and want these same things? We do but usually not at the expense of others.

Trump takes no responsibility for the current 3.68 million confirmed cases of COVID-19 and 141,000 deaths in the U.S. Since sociopaths have no feelings of empathy, Trump revels in attention, domination, and cruelty. I believe this is one of the worst results of childhood trauma. Since Trump thinks he is an expert on everything, there will be no moment of enlightenment to change his behaviors. To heal from trauma we are required to go deep inside our minds, bodies, and spirits to create a life with new morals, beliefs, and values. I doubt Trump will ever do this.

So how do we treat a traumatized and psychopathic U.S. president? We must repeatedly push back at Trump, calmly and persistently.

Never give up …

Child Abuse: An Unfathomable Travesty

 

 

Mary Jo with THE BEAR                                                      

Hello Wellness Seekers:

Did you know that my life’s mission is to bring awareness and healing to adult survivors of child abuse? I’m doing everything in my power to bring resolution and justice to those of us who were abused as children. This is difficult work, especially since the United States has one of the worst records among industrialized nation – losing on average between four and seven children every day to child abuse and neglect.

Source: https://www.childhelp.org/child-abuse-statistics/

Since the release of my book, THE BEAR: In the Middle of Between, I’ve been experiencing daily inspirational moments. Many of the people who read THE BEAR have been sharing their reviews and comments on child abuse with me. I’d like to share one with you to showcase why this book is so vital in the healing of this travesty.

From Mary Jo Wiseman, CMP | Author | The Meeting Planning Process: A Guide for Planning Successful Meetings

The Bear in the Middle of Between by Alexis Acker-Halbur is the compelling story of a young woman named Claudia.

Physically and sexually abused by her father from the time she was a small child, and with no support from her family, Claudia sees no way out other than to end her life. In the course of attempting to do so, she encounters a mystical presence in the form of a bear who leads her on a path of discovery and recovery.

Abuse of any kind is unacceptable, but when the initiator is the father who also happens to be a well-respected minister, the situation is an unfathomable travesty. Through her connection with a mystical bear and real-life counseling, Claudia is able to come to grips with her situation, confront her abuser, make amends with her siblings, and find joy in living.

I encourage anyone who is or has been a victim of abuse or knows of someone who is being abused as we speak, to read and share this book. Abusive behavior is a pattern, the chain of which needs to be and can be broken, one person, one family, one generation at a time.

Available at Minnesota-based Kirk House Publishers, publishing books for a cause. https://www.kirkhousepublishers.com/product-page/the-bear-in-the-midlle-of-between-by-alexis-acker-halbur

I hope you enjoy THE BEAR. Never give up!

Trauma and Health in a World of COVID-19

I was diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer in 2007. I truly believed that the cancer was caused by childhood trauma I had experienced. I began writing my book, Never Give Up: Break the Connection Between Stress and Illness, and made the bold statement that: Unresolved Childhood Trauma Causes Health Conditions in Adults. Several medical people said my statement had no statistics to support my belief. Still, I continued to work on my book to explain how I survived cancer. In 2014, when my book was published, I continued to get feedback from people saying there was no evidence to support my belief.

I never wavered in my belief that adults can resolve childhood trauma, and survive it without becoming ill.

In a May 2020 article in TIME Magazine, I found this amazing information: According to a 1998 landmark study, conducted by Kaiser Permanente and the CDC, childhood trauma is strongly correlated with a person’s health as an adult. The study explored Adverse Childhood Experiences, or ACEs, surveying more than 9,500 adults insured by Kaiser Permanente about ACEs they may have faced as children. These included ‘psychological, physical or sexual abuse,’ ‘violence against mother,’ and ‘living with household members who were substance abusers, mentally ill or suicidal, or ever imprisoned.’

These study findings were from 1998 – that’s nine years before my diagnosis with cancer. I wish I had known about this study earlier. Nonetheless, my belief that childhood trauma affects adult’s health IS very accurate. (Note: Even one ACE in childhood increases adult health risks.)

Luckily, a company like Kaiser Permanente is investing in efforts aimed at reducing the number of ACEs in our communities.

It’s Time for TRUTH!

I would like to invite the people at Kaiser Permanente to consider my T.R.U.T.H. Program. (The Road to Unresolved Trauma Healing.) The T.R.U.T.H. mission provides trauma survivors with the opportunity to resolve issues to achieve a healthy mind, body, and spirit.

All over the world, we’re trying to eradicate the coronavirus. Why not end adverse childhood trauma, too, since over 60 percent of adults in the U.S. experienced at least one ACE in childhood, while 1 in 6 experienced four or more.

To find more information on Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) please click on this link: https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/childabuseandneglect/acestudy